Subject: Re: Leaving... 
From: dinty_h_pal@my-dejanews.com (DINTY H)
Date: 1998/12/03
Forums: alt.tv.road-rules 
Message-ID: <3665e75f.41064185@news.alt.net>
Organization: LET"S BE CHAT PLAS!!1!!!11!!
References: <19981201050917.20638.00000565@ng99.aol.com>
            <19981201170626.07667.00000738@ng144.aol.com>
            <3664BD9A.A281AA76@my-dejanews.com>
            <3664cabb.20548779@news.alt.net>
            <742pko$164_004@lorid.nmcnet.edu>
Reply-To: dinty_h_pal@my-dejanews.com


On Wed, 02 Dec 1998 07:18:48 GMT, queasy@bigfoot.com (Laurel James)
wrote:

>dinty_h_pal@my-dejanews.com wrote:
>
>>I AM BACK CHAT PLA!11!! WHAT IS THE NEXT MOOVIE YOO WANT MEE TO
>>DOO??/??
>
>Well *there* you are, you little rapscallion. I've been saving these Dear 
>Dinty letters until you got back. I was about ready to pretend I was you and 
>answer 'em myself. But David H told me that wouldn't be right.
>

YES YES!!1!! ALLOW ME TO RECTIFY!!1!!

>-----------------
>Dear Dinty,
>
>My mommy's friend put whiskey in my baby bottle and now I really like it. Can 
>you get me some more, please?
>
>Giggly

DEER GIGLIE;

I WIL **8**NOT*8** KONTRIBUT TO THE DELINKWENSIE OF A MINER!11!! YOO
THING I DO"NT WASH JUDJ JUDIE AND ALLY MCBEEL??/?? YOU MAY NOT DRINK
WISKY, SKOTSH, JIN OR ANYTHINK ELS!!1! IS YOUR MOMS"S FREND IRISH OR
MAYBEE OSTRAYLIUN??//?

>---------------------------------------
>Dear Dinty,
>
>I like this one guy in school. He's really cute and I think he likes me back 
>but he always wants to copy my homework. Will he still like me if I don't 
>give him what he wants?
>
>Want to be Popular

DEER WANTS TO BE POPULER;

HE DOES"NT WANT YOUR HOMEWORK HE WANTS TO HAEV RELASHUNS WITH YOU!11!
GIVE HIM WAHT HE WANTS WHAT HE REELY REELY WANTS!!1!!!

PS IF YOU DO"NT HAEV RELASHUNS WITH HIM PLEES COME TO MY HOUS FOR A
PRIVIT KONSELING SESHUN!!1!!

>---------------------------------------
>Dear Dinty,
>
>What size shotgun shell should I use to blow out my neighbor's car windows?
>
>Don't Like Rap Music

DEER DO"NT LIEK CRAP MUSIK;

GO FOR THE GOLD!!1!! YUSE A TEN GAGE IN TRIPEL OT BUCK!!1! CAN I
COME??/?

>---------------------------------------
>Dear Dinty,
>
>I have a big crush on this cute little Korean gal I saw on the teevee. Do you 
>think she would like me if I iron my overalls and try to woo her? I'm not the 
>best looking fellow, but when I put my teeth in I think I'm okay. She's real 
>purty, though, and I'm feeling kinda intimidated. I'll try whatever you 
>suggest. I figger with that harem of your'n, you must be pretty good with the 
>ladies.
>
>Insecure

DEER INSEKUR;

YOO LIEK GIRLS OF THE ASHUN PERSUASHUN AND I MUST KONCUR!!1!! YOU
SHOOD LERN KOREEUN AND THEN YOU CAN WOO HER BUT GOOD!!11! HEY WATE A
MINUT....DOO YOU MEEN REEL WHURLD JANET??/??? HANDS OFF SHE IS
**8**MIEN**8* YOU HERE ME??/?? BACK OFF OR I WIL PUMMEL YOU WITH MY
STUMP BUT GOOD!!1!!!

>---------------------------------------
>Dear Dinty,
>
>Am I just sober for a change or do some of those biker guys at the Lounge not 
>look at good as they used to? I never really read the names all those skull 
>tattoos before.
>
>Reevaluating

DEER REEVALUATINK;

A NICE WON GIRL LIEK YOU SHOOD NOT GO AND MEET SUSH MEN!!1!! YOU NEED
TO DROP THOSE ZEROS AND FIND YURSELF A HERO!!1!!! MY FONE NUMBER IS IN
THE FONE BOOK!1!!!

>---------------------------------------
>Dear Dinty,
>
>I'm trying to be moral and upright but lately I just can't seem to stay awake 
>during preacher's sermon on Sundays. I'm getting lots of sleep at night so I 
>don't know what it could be. Do you have any suggestions on how to stay awake 
>and improve the state of my soul?
>
>Distracted

DEER HELLBOWND DISTRAKTED;

YES YOU CAN THING ABOUT ALL THE SLEEP YOU WO"NT BE GETING IN THE FIERS
OF HEL!!1!! FLESH BEING FLAYED OFF YUR BODIE, GROWING BACK AND BEING
FLAYED OF AGEN!!11!! MOLTEN LED PORED DOWN YOUR GULLET!11!! TRY TO
CATCH FORTIE WINKS WITH SNAKES CRAWLING OUT YOUR EYES!!1!!

>---------------------------------------
>Dear Dinty,
>
>I have this habit of saying lots of curse words and discussing the intimate 
>details of a personal medical condition in public forums. Is that so wrong?
>
>Coleslaw
>

DEAR CHAT PLA COALSLAW;

IT IS NOT RONG AT AL!!1!! YOU KEEP DOING YOUR THINK!!1!! I LOEV YOU
MAN!!1!! (BUT NOT THAT WAY...POOPERS ARE FOR POOPING!!1!!!)